SyFy Corner Update: Mega Python vs. Gatoroid vs. Debbie Gibson vs. Tiffany (via AnythingHorror Central)

It should be possible to find out who’s providing money for these types of movies, track them down, and shoot them. It should also be possible to find out how much money was spent on these individual travesties. And finally, yes, I can do better.

SyFy Corner Update:  Mega Python vs. Gatoroid vs. Debbie Gibson vs. Tiffany Go ahead and rub your eyes; I'll wait.  You read correctly.  Ever since the great match up between Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus (2009) hit Syfy and gave it HUGE ratings I've been waiting to see what the next great match-up will be.  I got my answer the other day when I received this press release from the SyFy Channel.  Next up is Mega Python duking it out with Gatoroid.  But wait … as if that wasn't enough we also get even more incentive to tu … Read More

via AnythingHorror Central

Tell Me a Story…

That can’t be the right title. I’ll probably change it later, however, the link will remain the same. Feel free to trackback 🙂

For purposes of illustration, let’s say that until I was eight years old, my great grandmother on my father’s side lived in our home. Well, not our home, but the home I grew up in, as I don’t really know where you lived back then. I don’t know when back then was for you back then either, for that matter.

I came home late one day, and she had asked why. I came up with some wild explanation which to my eight year old mind, sounded believable. There were no monsters involved, or anything. I believed that I simply decided to hangout with my friends on the way home, so, it took longer than normal, so, what I related was simply that I had played at my friend’s house. Which wasn’t actually true, as it just took us extra time for all of us to get home. She replied with, “I don’t believe you. You’re telling me a story.”

Confusing at the time, however, quite possibly relevant now, x amount of years later, as I don’t want to tell you the value of x. You can find that information elsewhere, as it’s freely available.

Why is it relevant, you may ask? Well, even if you don’t, as I’m sure all three of you know by now, I’m a filmmaker. By definition, this means that I make films. Of course, film is dead, but I did that rant on a long time ago. So long, in fact, that most of the links on that page goto sites that either no longer exist anymore, or point to entirely different companies. In any case, for sake of argument, let’s say you’re using film, even though it may be digital video or high def. Over the many years, I’ve heard various things about what you read or see in various mediums, and they all boil downto, “Is it a good story?”

Several definitions out there:

  • Something happens, and it’s interesting.
  • A story is what happens to characters you care about
  • An account or recital of an event or a series of events, either true or fictitious

Ok, three that I had readily available, but you get the idea. I guess by the last definition, both myself and ‘Grammy’ as I called her when I was a kid, were correct, although, for different reasons. I once heard that for a publisher to publish a story, it has to be good. Which of course is subject to interpretation. We are all storytellers in that regard, and as always, Sturgeon’s Law is in full force. And I believe he was making a conservative estimate. More on that probably another time, at a different blog.

So, now that I’ve padded my word count to arrive at some arbitrary number created by those that measure these types of things, I can really write whatever I want. However, if you’ve gotten this far, you’ll probably read the rest. And the point here is simply this: Good, Great, Amazing, etc. are all subjective terms. There may be a quality control issue that we need to address. And, as the aforementioned law, not to be confused with, The Law!!! states, ‘they’ may not know what they’re doing, either. Even if the greatest screenplay in the world is on their desk, and even if it’s yours, you still, might not get your movie made. At least, by them. At least you’re not this guy 🙂

That may be enough for today, so, as always, adjust your expectations accordingly, and by all means, please retweet. However, before you do, what’s your definition of story? I’m anxious to hear your thoughts….

Have Your People Call My People…

And, we’ll take a meeting, and do lunch. This famous Hollywood refrain has been said so many times as to become cliché. I guess I’m writing about it today, simply because the subject of meetings has come to the forefront, of if nothing else, my purview. Either that or a lot of other people have been writing, talking, blogging, etc. about them lately, and I figured that you, my three readers, would like my take.

I’m reminded of a story I heard once, when I was deeply ensconced in the tech sector, about a meeting that took place. Or rather, didn’t. Several attendees showed up, and waited for the meeting to start. And then, they waited some more. Finally, about ten minutes in, my friend spoke up, and asked, who’s leading this meeting? And he got the classic scene from well, any movie wherein no one wanted to take responsibility that was seated around the big conference table.

He proclaimed it, a Dilbert Meeting, and if you don’t read Dilbert everyday, you should be. Tell Scott Adams I said hello. In any case, my friend ultimately took control, and got something accomplished, and he realized later that a meeting had been scheduled by some generic meeting software that our company was using, if not properly. Turns out there was a similar meeting scheduled a month previous, and the secretary that posted it made it a monthly occurrence.

I had a conversation the other day, well, two days ago, actually, about meetings that exist simply to schedule other meetings. My friend stated that he’s advanced his division beyond that, so that actual work gets done. He wouldn’t explain to me how this works, however, my guess is that there’s only one person in his division that schedules meetings, and they’re responsible for the itinerary and who shows up, and who may or may not be asked to contribute.

In my industry, not to be confused with, the business as we’ve previously discussed, it’s become almost a habit to have a meeting, eat, and discuss what took place at the meeting. In essence, having two consecutive meetings for the price of one. There’s got to be a better way. Until such time as there aren’t meetings to discuss what took place at other meetings, and actual work gets done, in this specific case, getting a movie project greenlit, it would seem that this endless process of wasting time will continue.

I don’t have a good suggestion for making this process of salary justification stop, either. Yet another reason why I think Hollywood is broken, and will continue to be so, until there are fewer decision makers, and more people around to implement those decisions.

Adjust your expectations accordingly.